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Meet the 10 worst life insurance clients in the world

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On every life insurance application process, there is that moment of truth when you have to ask the client if they like to do anything really reckless with their free time. Usually, people all say no, thinking that if they keep their love of bungee jumping a secret, it won’t impact their ability to get life insurance. Of course, that kind of shenanigan will void almost any coverage, but still, it causes one’s eyes to roll that folks out there might think that life insurance is for covering people who are hellbent on walking that line between life and death.

But they are out there. Heck, you probably have one or two as clients. The question is, are any of them as bad as these 10 daredevils? Take a look through our Gallery of the Worst Life Insurance Clients Ever, and then at the end, let us know which of these you would be least willing to arrange coverage for. 

 1. Extreme Mountain Bikers

It’s harder than you might think to get decent figures on how many people kill themselves riding mountain bikes each year, but if they go tearing around like French daredevil Rémy Métailler as he slaps a GoPro camera on his helmet and rockets through the Whistler bike park one last time before it closes, the danger factor is quite high. I don’t know about you, but every one of those jumps looked like he was going to land on some cloud before the Pearly Gates.

 

 2. Wingsuit Flyers 

Wingsuits are pretty cool, and every time I see them in action, I want to put one on and go soaring. Then I remember that actually, you’re not flying, you’re just falling diagonally, and that if you hit something, you are probably going to die. Don’t believe me? Just ask Jeb Corliss, the world’s foremost wingsuit flyer, who almost bought it on South Africa’s Table Mountain.

 

 

3. People who feed crocodiles by hand 

When I visited Costa Rica, there was one river — the Tarcoles — where you never saw anybody swimming or fishing, despite the fact that it was the second biggest river in the country. The reason was because it was infested with crocodiles. And they were not kidding, either. The crocs were everywhere. But you could go on a boat tour of the river, where the guide eventually got out and would feed one of the crocs some raw chicken by hand. The croc our guide found was this behemoth they called Osama bin Laden, because he was so difficult to find. It was nearly 18 feet long. Feeding it would not be my idea of a good time. You never heard of these guides becoming part of the meal, but it seems as though it would only be a matter of time, as it nearly was for this fellow…

Turns out, there are a lot of guides who do this, and the crocs know they don’t need to eat the guide, since the guide brings them food. Still, that strikes me as a weak shield at best.

 

4. Idiots with guns 

I am an armchair firearms enthusiast. I’d own a collection, but my wife won’t let me keep them in the house, and since I live in the People’s Republic of New Jersey, I’d have to shoot at some range that would cost me an arm and a leg to join. That said, the one thing I appreciate more than guns is gun safety. Which is something not everybody who shoots believes in.

 

This next guy was just a victim of a really fluky ricochet, but somehow, I doubt it would be of much comfort to his family — or his insurance agent — had that slug deviated just another inch off course…

 

Confession time: as scary as that .50 cal shooter’s close call was, the sound that bullet made on the return trip was pretty cool.

5. Rally car spectators 

We all know that racing in cars is a prime way to void your life policy, but you know what? Standing at the edge of a rally race should, too. Look at how close these cars get! Even outside of these near-death collisions, having a race car fly by you three feet away still counts as a near-death experience in my book. 

A lot of these spectators are way calmer than I would be, had I gotten that close to joining the great big Top Gear episode in the sky.

 

6. Guys who crash farm machines for fun 

What’s the only thing that seems like more fun than a regular demolition derby? One with great big farm combines, that’s what! See, this is what makes America great. Of course, this is also what makes my insides clench at the thought of one of these bad boys going wrong when they wreck. 

 

Now, chances are, these monster machines can take a far better beating then regular cars do, but the thought of falling out during the battle kind of puts this on my NEVER EVER list.

 

7. People who surf glaciers 

Leave it to Alaskans to invent all kinds of strange and exotic ways to kill yourself by accident all in the name of cheap thrills.

 

Having said that, this does look kind of fun. And by fun, I mean something I would instantly regret the moment I did it.

 

8. People who don’t respect fireworks 

My brothers and I got into a lot of shenanigans as kids, but we never got into doing stupid things with fireworks because we all valued having complete sets of fingers. That lesson is lost on some people, apparently.

 

 People like this ruin the 4th of July for everybody. Don’t be that guy. Or this guy.

 

9. Folks who fly dodgy airplanes 

Honestly, this could be almost anyone who flies, which is why aviators have a tough time with their life insurance. There are a lot of great pilots out there. My neighbor, who runs a banner plane service, is one of them. But he knows full well that every time he goes up, he is taking a chance that he might not come down at a speed of his choosing. 

 

This guy gets a huge salute for keeping his cool and preventing a tragedy. Same for this next guy, who saves his old warbird with the most dynamic freeway merge ever caught on film.

 

10. Anyone who runs with the bulls 

This is not so much a sporting or cultural event, as it is a public service to weed out the knuckleheads from the shallow end of the gene pool. Anywhere else, a stampede of angry livestock would be something to avoid. And every year, there are a few people who come to that same conclusion, although a little too late to do them any good.

 

And then, somehow, it all gets even more chaotic.

 

So there you have it, our roundup of some of the worst possible life insurance clients you could ever have. What do you think? Which of these would you be least willing to write a policy for?

Extreme mountain bikers

Wingsuit flyers

Anyone who likes to feed crocodiles 

Anyone who can’t be trusted with a gun 

Anyone who likes to attend rally car races

Anyone who competes in farmland demolition derbies 

Surfers…WHO SURF GLACIERS 

Idiots with Fireworks 

Small-time pilots 

People who think they are faster than a bull 

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