The best ‘won’t be in today’ excuses

Are we a nation of excuse-makers? CareerBuilder’s latest survey of more than 5,000 human resources managers and non-HR employees suggests that is indeed the case.

CareerBuilder queried those folk on the subject of calling in to work to say “I won’t be in today because…”

“While half (49 percent) of employees say they have a Paid Time Off program that allows them to use their time off however they choose, 23 percent of those workers say they still feel obligated to make up an excuse for taking a day off,” CareerBuilder said.

And now, without further ado, here are the more amusing excuses gathered by CareerBuilder in this year’s survey:

• Employee just put a casserole in the oven.
• Employee’s plastic surgery for enhancement purposes needed some “tweaking” to get it just right.
• Employee was sitting in the bathroom and her feet and legs fell asleep. When she stood, up she fell and broke her ankle.
• Employee had been at the casino all weekend and still had money left to play with on Monday morning.
• Employee woke up in a good mood and didn’t want to ruin it.
• Employee had a “lucky night” and didn’t know where he was.
• Employee got stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store and couldn’t get out.
• Employee had a gall stone they wanted to heal holistically.
• Employee caught their uniform on fire by putting it in the microwave to dry.
• Employee accidentally got on a plane.

One positive note for the bosses: CareerBuilder said the survey showed that “over the past year, 28 percent of employees have called in to work sick when they were feeling well, down from 32 percent last year.”