Santa comes down the chimney on Christmas night. Most people put out milk and cookies. Should you be waiting there, ask him to sit for a bit and discuss insurance with him? Why has no one thought of this before?
Santa is head of a worldwide manufacturing and logistics operation. Amazon is good, but Santa is better. He gets everyone’s packages delivered in one night. He mastered in home delivery long before Amazon developed the technology. As agents and advisors attending holiday events know, you can’t get close to a corporate mover and shaker like Santa 11 months of the year, but be in the right place at the right time in December and he shows up.
(Related: What to Do for Clients at the Holidays)
The question isn’t should you sell Santa insurance, the bigger question is would he be insurable at all. There are lots of products to consider. Fortunately, in this story, you have all the necessary licenses. (Santa’s elves are great with paperwork.)
1. Life insurance
Apparently, Santa is 1,749 years old. He is off the charts on longevity tables. The bigger issue may be Santa’s lifestyle. He climbs on roofs. How is that different from rock climbing? That’s often an exclusion, especially since Santa does his climbing outdoors, not in a gym.
Verdict: Santa would be difficult, if not impossible as a candidate for life insurance.
2. Health Insurance
At age 1,749 Santa is old enough to have qualified for Medicare 1,684 years ago. Maybe, if he’s coming to you for advice, he’s now an American. Assuming that’s the case, he would likely need a supplemental policy. Lung disease could be an issue. Apparently, he slides down chimneys. There’s that roof climbing issue again.
Verdict: Santa would likely have difficulty qualifying for medically underwritten health insurance. Thank goodness he’s eligible for Medicare.
3. Liability Insurance
Like driving a car overseas, your concern is the damage you might do to other people’s property. He lands that sleigh on house after house. If there’s 7.7 billion people in the world and the US has an average household size of 2.6 people (call it 3) Santa is visiting 2.567 billion households on Christmas night. If the chances of property damage are a million to one, that’s 2,567 instances.
Verdict: We are not insuring Santa for damage to other people’s property. The risk is open-ended.
4. Auto Insurance
Does the sleigh get classified as a car? Maybe a wagon, since it’s pulled by eight reindeer? Let’s assume it’s a car. He drives a lot. He uses it for work. It’s always full of packages. He leaves the sleigh, still loaded with packages to slide down each chimney. On the plus side, the sleigh is parked on a rooftop, not in the driveway. Also, the sleigh doesn’t seem like a complicated vehicle to repair. There are no records of Santa getting any traffic tickets.
Verdict: We can probably get Santa auto insurance, although he would likely go into an assigned risk pool.