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6 New Jokes for LTC Planners

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Comedy is just tragedy with punchlines.

It can be the (secret, disreputable) friend of insurance agents, brokers, consultants and others who are fed up with low interest rates, high premiums, consumers who have the financial courage of an ostrich, and short, gray winter days.

You can’t do anything about the lack of sunshine (or NPR-enhanced anxiety about usually warm, sunny winter days), but at least you can laugh at the lack of sunshine and do your best to make the sky ashamed of itself.

Because, really, it could do better.

See also: 20 funny jokes for a work holiday party

For a look at six jokes written especially for the long-term care (LTC) planning community, read on.


1. At the door

Knock knock.

Who’s there?


Who’s there?


Who’s there?

Dementia. What’s the matter with you?

As long as I refuse to notice you, you’re not there. Right?

See also: LTC awareness campaign support grows


2. The road

Question: Why did the caregiver chicken cross the road?

Answer: Because that’s about all the fun she had time for while her sister looked after the rooster.

See also: Ad Campaign Portrays Caregivers’ Call for Help

Haunted hands

3. The gap

Question: Why do Martians get along so well with caregivers?

Answer: Because caregivers are used to feeling as if they and most of the people around them are from different planets.

See also: 8 new facts about LTC caregivers who suffer


4. Word problem

One caregiver who has a lot of worries has 10 slices of bread and 5 slices of turkey.

Another caregiver, who has no worries, has 12 slices of bread and 4 slices of turkey.

If each turkey sandwich has to have 2 slices of bread and 1 slice of turkey, which caregiver can make more sandwiches?


Trick question. There is no such thing as a caregiver with no worries.

See also: 5 ways to sell LTCI to boomers

Rosy landscape

5. Perspectives

An optimist, a pessimist and a narcissist all passed by the table taking names for an LTC planning information contact list.

The optimist signed up, saying, “Maybe this stuff could come in handy.”

The pessimist signed up, saying, “I could end up in a terrible situation.”

The narcissist passed on by, telling the LTC planner at the table, “Everything will work out fine for me. Whenever I get through talking to people, I hear people saying, ‘Someone really ought to take care of that guy!’”

See also: Medicaid Planning Critic Goes to Capitol Hill

Piggy bank in a vise

6. Found humor

Most people don’t need any special LTC arrangements.

They’ll just pay for care out of their savings!!!

See also: Nearly half of Americans are underprepared for retirement

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