9 Things Successful People Do Differently: Harvard Business Review

4. Be a realistic optimist. Engage in lots of positive thinking about achieving your goals, but don’t underestimate how hard it will be to get there, Halvorson recommends. Studies show that thinking things will come to you easily and effortlessly leaves you ill-prepared for the journey ahead, and significantly increases the odds of failure.

5. Focus on getting better rather than being good. “Many of us believe that our intelligence, our personality, and our physical aptitudes are fixed—that no matter what we do, we won’t improve,” she writes. “As a result, we focus on goals that are all about proving ourselves, rather than developing and acquiring new skills. Fortunately, decades of research suggest that the belief in fixed ability is completely wrong—abilities of all kinds are profoundly malleable.”

6. Show some grit. Not only do studies show that gritty people get more education in their lifetimes and earn higher college GPAs, but they are also the cadets who will stick out their first grueling year at West Point. “Effort, planning, persistence, and good strategies are what it really takes to succeed,” Halvorson writes.

7. Build your willpower muscle. Like the muscles in your body, your self-control “muscle” also requires exercise. “To build willpower, take on a challenge that requires you to do something you’d honestly rather not do,” Halvorson writes. “Give up high-fat snacks, do 100 sit-ups a day, stand up straight when you catch yourself slouching, try to learn a new skill. When you find yourself wanting to give in, give up, or just not bother — don’t.”

8. Don’t tempt fate. Successful people know not to make reaching a goal harder than it already is, Halvorson says, “No matter how strong your willpower muscle becomes, it’s important to always respect the fact that it is limited, and if you overtax it you will temporarily run out of steam. Don’t try to take on two challenging tasks at once, if you can help it (like quitting smoking and dieting at the same time).” 

9. Focus on what you will do, not what you won’t do. “Plan how you will replace bad habits with good ones, rather than focusing only on the bad habits themselves,” Halvorson writes. “Research on thought suppression (e.g., “Don’t think about white bears!”) has shown that trying to avoid a thought makes it even more active in your mind. The same holds true when it comes to behavior—by trying not to engage in a bad habit, our habits get strengthened rather than broken.”