Making Your Clients Feel Understood

The big issue in this industry is that advisors aren’t trained to converse; they’ve been trained to tell and sell. Telling and selling are monolog — not dialogues. Those techniques control the flow of communication leading to the close. Until you let go of that control mechanism, a conversation cannot take place.

What’s the first step to becoming a master conversationalist?

Enter as a student, not as a teacher. That is, I’m not here to tell you and instruct you; I’m here to understand something about you.

Why is empathy important to conversing?

If I ask you a question and you tell me a meaningful story, and then, based on that, I say, “I think we should try the following with your financial situation,” I’m anchoring your life experience to my advice and service. That’s powerful.

What do you consider to be the vital question advisors must ask at the end of each client conversation?

“Did you get everything you needed or that you hoped for from our conversation today?” Because you know that you’ll ask that question, you’ll be disciplined within the conversation to make sure you’re serving the client’s needs. The magic is that by asking it at the end, it shapes your behavior during the conversation.    

How does that ultimately help the FA?

If your client walks away feeling they got what they needed, it’s tremendous. They’ll come back, and they’ll tell other people about you.

Why is credibility heightened when you’re a productive conversationalist?

When a client walks away feeling, “That [advisor] gets me,” your credibility rises as a human being. It’s the first place to establish credibility, not just as a financial professional but as a person. Show me two advisors equal in ability, and I’ll choose what I sense to be the better human being. Where do we demonstrate that humanity? The greatest opportunity is in a conversation.

So a conversation is another form of opportunity knocking?

Absolutely. It’s a chance for me to show who I am.